How I’m (Actually) Going to Balance Blogging & High School

How I’m (Actually) Going to Balance Blogging & High School

This is me, happier than I’ve been in a long time. Why? Because I’m finally working on finding balance.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you may have noticed a change in the number of posts coming from me over the summer break and into back to school season in August. I’d like to explain, but this time without excuses.

I’d also like to tell you how I’m going to change because although balancing blogging and high school isn’t the easiest, I’ve realized it’s something I need to figure out for my own personal happiness.

So this post is, in a way, a continuation of How I (Attempt to) Balance Blogging & High School.

First things first: Why did I stop blogging for so long (or blog so irregularly)?

I got the idea of quality over quantity in my head, but it wasn’t until I realized how unhappy I was not writing when I understood I was looking at that concept all wrong.

I thought it was more important that I disappear for a while but come back with one fantastic post than to regularly push out smaller posts that I don’t have the time and flexibility to work on as much.

What I didn’t realize, is that when I would put out a post after not doing so for such a long time, I wasn’t actually proud of it and I wasn’t happy.

I guess you could say I’ve had an epiphany. It’s more important to me that I continue to push myself to be creative and get new creative content out there than to focus all on my energy on school work (or procrastinating my school work).

I would rather put out a bunch of smaller posts that I’m proud of than to put out one big messy one that I’m not.

I would rather make time for a little bit of creativity and expression each week than to sit around and wonder when I’ll have the time to.

In other words, word count is not a good way to measure quality over quantity.

After all, there’s nothing wrong with a quick read!

This blog is something I really love, and I don’t plan on giving up on it. Not now, not ever.

I have so many people around me who love and support me, and they motivate me to keep going. Even though I’m not seeing as much growth as I hoped I would by now, that’s okay and I understand because I haven’t gotten to put in the time and effort so many other people do.

The dream works, but only if you do. I haven’t been, but I plan to. Sometimes life happens.

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For example, I started writing this fairly short, straight-forward post a little over a week ago with the intention of it going up last Saturday, but then I got sick, like super sick, for five days. I missed three days of school and I slept for almost two days straight.

Sometimes, things can’t be helped, but here I am, it’s a whole new week, and I’m still determined to share this post with you. Why? Because it’s important. It’s something that I’m sure all creative people go through at least a million times during their life. The struggle of balance.

I thought senior year of high school was going to be all fun and games, and come to find out, first semester is not. Definitely not.

Between college applications (Which I’ve actually done two, just not for schools that I’m actually genuinely interested in going to), senior classes, test scores, work, trying to maintain some kind of social life, and thinking about how this blog is being put on the backburner YET AGAIN, I. Was. Dying.

It’s only September, but already I feel like the worst is mostly over. Other than college applications, which in my true nature, I can’t help but to procrastinate them, I’m already feeling better about life.

I think joining the school newspaper this year may have been one of the best decisions I could have made, I have so many new ideas for this blog and how I can carry them out, things seem less overwhelming at work now, and I’m actually feeling really good about the future, other than, ya know, college because YIKES.

All these things are why I’ve set my new goal for this blog to be one post a week. Some weeks they’ll be big, thought-out, creative posts, sometimes they’ll just be smaller posts, like the occasional rant, a post about Emily or my family, a monthly playlist or favorites, or even another Life Lately, where I sit down and pour my heart out to you about what’s going on in my life at the moment because after all, this is a lifestyle blog.

However, the one thing I never want to lose sight of is the fact that I firmly believe I am a positivity-based lifestyle blog. I believe a positive attitude has the power to change absolutely everything. By choosing kindness, and understanding, you can forever change this world. By spreading love, you give this world hope. Together, we can easily do this.

I can’t wait for what’s next.

Thanks for stopping by,

 

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Life Lately #4

Life Lately #4

Hey guys!

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve sat down and had some real talk with you, so today, that’s what’s going to happen.

My life has been crazy recently. I just got hit with a big reality check.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while now or you know me personally, you know that I’m seventeen years old and I don’t have my driver’s license yet.

Yeah I know, it’s pretty pathetic.

I don’t know why, but I don’t enjoy driving. I’m excited to drive myself around, but I really don’t like to drive. I know, I’m definitely not your average teenager. But I know I need my license so I will get it soon enough.

It’s especially pathetic because I do have a job that I have to get to, but I am very fortunate to have such wonderful parents who have flexible enough schedules that they can help me get where I need to go.

However, the time of them carting my ass all over town is about over.

I have known for several months now that I have to have my license before I go into my senior year because I got an internship, which means I have to get myself from school to my internship every single day next school year.

Which is all fine and dandy, but another part of that equation is that I have to have a car.

I have just recently acknowledged that I have a spending problem. I have a tendency to spend more than I should and I don’t even know what it is that I buy. It could easily be a million times worse, but with all the things I should be saving for, my spending habits are getting me nowhere. Besides, it will only make things worse when I have to start making a car payment.

So I’m working on a list of goals for myself when it comes to managing my money, which I know with my newfound motivation I will be able to succeed, but just to be safe, I applied for a second job.

This may seem excessive for a seventeen-year-old, but it’s what I need to do.

I love my parents so much and they work so very hard, but this is one of those things that they can’t help me with and I understand that.

They wish they could just buy me a new car and hand over the keys no strings attached, but that’s just not possible for us. So I understand and I am willing to work even harder to make this work.

They really have spoiled me all my life so I genuinely appreciate having to do something on my own and work twice as hard because it’s a life lesson. It’s an important thing to experience.

However, me getting a second job, makes me even more of an inconvenience to my parents when it comes to having to get me to two jobs now instead of one, which means getting a car is now more important than ever.

Even though I am going to improve my spending habits and make several lifestyle changes, my bank account needs a lot of improvement. Even if I had been saving every penny I earned, I wouldn’t be where I need to be. So needless to say, money is tight right now.

I am doing a couple of extra things to help save up a little money on the side. I will be cleaning out my closet and posting the items on Poshmark over the next couple weeks to sell and I’d love if you would follow along so you can take a look when they go live. Or if you’re feeling a little generous, you can take a look at my Buy Me a Coffee page. Either way, your support means the world to me.

If my life couldn’t get any crazier, I already had a lot going on this summer before all this set in. I’m currently taking two online courses, which if you were here last summer, you know I swore I would never do this again, but alas here I am knocking out a couple required classes so I can have more time to do what I love senior year.

Anyways, these classes are not nearly as hard as the ones I’ve done in the past and require minimal effort, but quite a bit of time, time that I have been hesitant to give up.

Why? Because I would rather be blogging, writing, and creating content for you. I want to continue to grow this blog and my Instagram, but it has been insanely hard to juggle both.

I wish I didn’t have to, but I need to spend less time on this blog. I didn’t want to do so without telling you. That is the main reason why I’m here writing this post and filling you in on all the things that are happening and changing right now.

I need to put all my time and energy into finishing these classes in the next few weeks, and I haven’t been able to allow myself to do that when I have been worrying about my blog.

I have a couple other posts all ready to go up and a couple all planned out that I am still hoping to upload soon, but I wanted you to know that for right now, this blog is on the back burner until my classes are over. I hope you can understand.

My goal is that if I work really hard, I might be able to finish them early and return to doing solely what I love even sooner, but if I still find a way to procrastinate, then I will be back here on a regular basis for the rest of the summer after the second week of July.

This absolutely isn’t goodbye, it’s just letting you know that posts will continue to go up randomly and not as frequently, as they have so far this summer. I’m hoping to upload content on a more regular basis once my classes are over, so please stick with me.

I appreciate all your support. Every comment, every like, every share, every bit of interaction I receive makes a difference, inspires me to do more, and become a better person. Thank you for always supporting me on this crazy adventure.

As always . . .

Thanks for stopping by,

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This I Believe . . .

This I Believe . . .

This year, as part of my final exam for my favorite class, I had to give a speech. This was not your typical speech, it was a personal speech about my personal beliefs. For my speech, I decided to talk a little about my blog. By a little, I mean I turned a 2-4 minute speech into an almost 7-minute long ordeal about my blog, why I write and who I am.

You all who read my blog regularly know that I have a lot to say. I don’t like to speak out loud, especially not in front of large groups, but knowing I got to write it all out beforehand made me feel at least a little better about it.

I am really proud of what I wrote and decided to say in front of my class, so I thought I would share it on here with you all. **Disclaimer, yes, it really is ridiculously long.


I have always been the quiet girl. I don’t like to speak up, and sometimes I feel like I don’t even know how. I have always had a hard time expressing how I feel to people. When I try to say it out loud I struggle to portray what I mean or my emotions take over and make it impossible to express what I mean. So I choose to just sit there and mull over my thoughts in my head until the moment for me to speak is long gone. The words in my head have always been louder than the ones I speak. Those words I can put on paper to create something powerful. I feel so much safer behind a laptop typing behind a screen or handwriting my thoughts on paper. Nobody can interrupt or immediately respond because there is some unknown force that compels people to finish what is written in its entirety. That’s really the beauty of writing. The merging of words, words you specifically choose, into a creation of your own, to express however you’re feeling, whatever your message is, in ways you can’t do with the words that roll off your tongue. It was this love for writing, along with my awkwardness and desire to create, that made me think creating my own blog was a good idea.

The scary thing about words is that you never know who will read them. When you’re looking at someone and having a conversation with them, you know whether or not they are hearing what you’re saying, but you really don’t know if it will be remembered or have an impact.

I have always loved writing because I am really bad with words in person. I find it extremely difficult to tell someone how I’m feeling or explain why I feel a certain way. It doesn’t translate to how I really feel, even if I’m using the right words, I’m tripping over them which makes it harder to understand. However, if you give me a piece of paper and a pen or you sit me behind a computer, I can spell it all out for you.

Sometimes I feel like writing is my superpower. The way I feel when I am able to express how I feel on paper when I haven’t been able to explain it to someone in person. When I come home from school and my mom asks,“What’s wrong?” sometimes I can’t answer her because I have yet to figure it out. I almost have to say, “Give me an hour, some time to write it out, and I’ll get back to you.” It’s funny to me the number of people who hate writing or really don’t enjoy it because for me it’s my only lifeline.

I have always loved words and writing. It has just been in the last few years I have been able to figure out that whatever I want to do, writing has to be a part of it. Part of me feels like my adoration for writing is caused in part by my personality and part by my environment.

I am shy: I don’t have a lot of confidence in myself, eye contact is a typically a challenge, and I am always questioning my own knowledge. This is why I like to think about what I’m going to say before I follow through with it and leave my mark. When I’m writing something out, I can take as long as I want and can have a million drafts before I decide:“Yes! That’s what I want to say. That’s my message.”

The environmental factor has to be my family. My sister, Emily, she is so special. She’s unique, she’s one of a kind, and I truly can’t put into words how amazing she really is. I was able to discover all these things about her without ever having a conversation with her. Emily can’t talk. I hate to phrase it that way because I firmly believe someday she will, but for now, and for the last seventeen years, my sister has not spoken a word.

I guess you could say I learned about the power of words through her silence. The simplest words like “Water,” “Sad,” and “Help” to describe her needs and emotions could make such an impact on her everyday life, but they just aren’t there for her to use, at least for right now.

I stick up for her all the time and have written many a passive-aggressive email to teachers who don’t understand that she is a human being who needs extra help sometimes. She can’t speak, but I make sure that she is spoken for.

When we go out in public, I show that I respect her, I show how much I care for her, to let people know there is nothing wrong with her even though she’s a little different. I use my body language, how I interact with my sister in social situations, to express that. I have learned that from my sister too: Body language is also a powerful thing.

I’m not afraid to talk about her, and I am definitely not ashamed of her. If you want to ask me about her, then ask me. Curiosity shows me that you care, and I respect that. After all, the only way we are ever going to make it in this world is if we at least try to understand each other. Don’t be afraid to start the conversation.

Because of my sister, I have made it one of my top goals in life to spread the message of positivity, love, and acceptance. It is something I emphasize a lot in my everyday life, on social media, and on my blog.

My blog is called the Look She Can Blog. It sounds a little cheesy, I am well aware, but I chose this because everyone and I mean everyone, has been met with criticism and has been told that there are things they can’t do. My sister deals with this kind of criticism every day; Sometimes it is only expressed through other people’s body language, but it’s there, she sees it, and it hurts.

So I named my blog for her. Why? Because I feel like her story is an epic and relatable story. It also might be a little because she’s the coolest sister ever, and I really wanted her to be a part of this, this hobby that makes me incredibly happy, but I have to emphasize again that her story is very powerful.

I relate to her story because for a long time I let a lot of people walk all over me. I take others people’s burdens and try to take all the weight on my own shoulders, sometimes it’s too much for me to handle. I don’t reach out enough sometimes, and I don’t like to talk about my feelings. There’s a lot of people in my life who don’t know how I feel. Somedays I want to completely cut myself off from the world, and a little part of me breaks when I realize I’m feeling what I know all too well as losing hope.

But I try not to let it get to me because there is so much to be hopeful about in this world. Instead, I take a break, get myself into a positive headspace, surround myself with people I love, and write something for my blog to hopefully make somebody else’s day a lot better.

Why do I do this? Well, I finally figured out that I can’t achieve my goal of spreading positivity when I’m at home, curled up in a ball, feeling sorry for myself, eating ice cream, and watching Hallmark movies with my mom.

Besides, I have never let anyone walk all over my sister and treat her like a doormat, so why should I let people do that to me? What about the other voiceless people out there, why should I let that happen to anybody? I have to speak up somehow for the people who have been labeled as less than by their peers because unfortunately, I am too familiar with what that feels like.

I have never understood why people like to tear others down. If you hurt someone’s feelings, it’s probably because you are trying to fill some kind of hole in your heart, and you think by breaking down someone else it will somehow fill you up, but it only leaves you feeling more empty than before. Why do that when you can make someone else feel good, which then has the power to make you feel good almost by default? What is even the point of being mean?

I’m sure people have their reasons, but I am convinced I won’t ever truly understand it. Especially online. When writing something online, you have nothing but time to come up with a good, respectful response. There’s no panicking about coming up with the perfect comeback, if it’s your turn to respond, you have all the time you need to write out what needs to be said.

There are so many beautiful, positive, and inspiring words people could use, but still, there are people who choose harsh and cruel words to have a negative impact on people instead.

I think that’s why I wanted so badly to create a positive space online, where people can read something that will make them feel good, hopefully, make them smile, or maybe learn a little more about someone who isn’t exactly like them, but is still just as important. I know not everybody here likes school, but learning something new about someone and learning about acceptance is such a beautiful thing, and I feel its power is underrated.

My blog started as a place where I wrote things just for me, things that made me happy, things that I wanted to share, but didn’t have enough confidence to. I knew it was public, but I never knew how many people would see it, who would read it, and who it would affect.

Now here I am. It’s been over a year since my blog was born, and I am here, telling you all about it, my message, my story, and my life. I never thought I would have the strength to share my little online world with my family and friends, let alone a room full of people who barely know me.

Nevertheless, I am here. Proud of the words I have written and decided to say aloud in front of you all today. I hope maybe we can all understand and try to accept each other a little better now.


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Thank you for supporting me and reading my content. I appreciate every view, every like, every share, and every comment, more than you could imagine. Because of this blog, I get to share I what I believe in. I believe in having hope, I believe that happiness is something everyone can achieve if they open their heart, and I believe that by having a positive mindset and trying your best to understand and accept others as they are, is the only way this world will ever be united. I believe that someday things will change, whether I am here to see it or not, I know someday we’ll get there.

I hope you all have a wonderful day and as always . . .

Thanks for stopping by,

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How I (Attempt to) Balance Blogging & High School

How I (Attempt to) Balance Blogging & High School

Welcome to My Office!

This comfy spot right here on my bed is where most of my blog things happen. We save homework for the kitchen table or my desk when it isn’t covered in piles of college advertisements and receipts.

Here is where I write blog posts, take my flatlays, other pictures like this one, plan out what is next to come in my planner, and jot down ideas or poems in my notebook. So technically, this is where it all happens.

I guess this spot being my office kind of helps me balance. Most of the time I’m up ridiculously late working on procrastinated homework, but some nights I find that inspiration strikes and so I get out my laptop and begin working on a new post for whatever concept has suddenly popped in my head before I go to sleep.

I have so many things I want to write about. There is an endless number of things I want to share and explain, but all these ideas usually come to me in one sitting, with not nearly enough time to complete them all. So this is how I have so many drafts in the works.

Currently, I have 45 drafts. 45 posts, or starts of posts, some of which I eventually want to finish and publish. Some of them I might never finish because I just don’t feel like they really work for what I want this blog to be anymore, but most of them I probably will.

Who knows, I might even be able to save the drafts I’m not sure I want to publish and turn them into something new, something that fits who I am now. Only time will tell.

All I can say is: It’s not easy. The desire to be creative and to do the things I can to push myself toward whatever future it is that I want while also being given busy work at school about things I really don’t care about all that much

is hard.

I know the things I learn about in school are important, at least for me to further my education in college. Because y’all know that blogging doesn’t require precalc or chemistry otherwise ya girl wouldn’t be here.

I really enjoy this. I love having this platform to talk about things I’m passionate about and sometimes I find new things I’m passionate about in history, psychology or english class, which then reminds me why I kind of do enjoy school. Because then I can talk about those new things that interest me here: This place that is like a diary that everyone can read and has the possibility to learn from.

On this blog, I want to continue my advocacy for people with disabilities and to share more about Emily, push myself to create more fashion-related content, dabble in digital art and other art forms, and continue to candidly share more about my personal life, interests, and experiences.

I will continue to do this, but it is extremely hard sometimes. I don’t always feel like I have the time, and when I do, I lack the motivation it takes to get stuff done because I am exhausted.

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I slept in for the first time in months this week. The first day I slept until 11:30, the second until about noon. I typically hate sleeping in anymore because I always feel groggy and like I can never really wake up. So then I waste the rest of my day lazing about doing nothing, maybe even sleeping more.

It was Winter Break back in December, that was the last time I really slept in. I have been working every weekend since then, and obviously, school just has to start at 7:35 every morning so I don’t have the opportunity to sleep in then either. It just hasn’t happened for me.

Which is okay, I don’t mind, but I didn’t realize how tired I was. Those two days I slept in this week didn’t affect me like they normally do. I felt refreshed and was more awake. I know you can’t ever catch up on sleep, but those two days of sleeping in told me exactly how sleep deprived I was because I could tell my body really needed it.

So I guess you could also say I’m juggling sleep too.

But so goes the creative lifestyle, right? Living the creative dream, choosing writing over sleep, photography over time management, and choosing to embrace new literature whenever possible instead of getting caught up on that psychology project that is due next week, all while trying to make it out of high school alive and with a diploma in hand.

It is without a doubt a struggle, but a struggle I don’t mind continuing. Things will eventually get easier as I become more experienced, and I will hopefully have less schoolwork (if I’m very lucky).

So in conclusion, it is possible to balance high school and blogging, but there are probably a lot of people out there doing it a whole lot better than I am, but I promise I’m going to make it, somehow.

Thanks for stopping by,

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It’s Been a Long Time . . .

It’s Been a Long Time . . .

I am currently happier than I have been in a long time. I still deal with a lot of daily stress as my life is heading almost out of control toward the future, which still seems so unclear to me, even though I have so much more figured out than I did a year ago. The whole “make it happen” part is pretty scary, but hey, I’m human and that’s just kind of how life works sometimes, and I am still perfectly content with the way things are going right now.

Actually this time last year I started this blog. I have been doing this for a year now, and it feels so crazy to think about. One day in February of 2017, I just started writing more, taking photos and investing more time into being creative; More time into what I love and enjoy. I also made several lifestyle changes that should be addressed.

I started putting myself first. I’ve said this once, but I will say it a million times more, if it gets to a point where you are emotionally drained from living in someone else’s story, take a step back and write your own narrative, even when it seems hard, and don’t feel guilty about it. I began investing all my efforts into other people’s situations, which was not so great for my mental health. Sometimes you just have to walk away, and that is okay.

“She remembered who she was and the game changed.” —Lalah Deliah

I removed toxic people from my life. It was so hard to say goodbye, but sometimes you just have to rip yourself out from someone else’s feet when they get a little comfortable walking all over you. I’m not a carpet, not even a flying magical one (even though that might be kind of cool, but alas, I’m not any kind of floor garment), so please don’t treat me like one.

“No matter the situation, never let your emotions overpower your intelligence.”

I’m being more hopeful for the future. I’m starting to believe this daydream of mine could actually become a reality. I  am allowing my dream to be the driving force towards my future. I have found something I am extremely passionate about and I put everything I can into it. If I want to turn this blog of mine into a small business someday, why can’t I?

I worry less about what people think, I still worry, just definitely not as much as I used to. I’m a little more carefree now, but only as carefree as a tightly coiled spring can be. She will loosen up from time to time, bounce a little, and have some fun. She doesn’t care about the height she’ll reach, as long as she bounces where she pleases and she’s happy along the way. She’s finally learned to stop comparing her abilities to others. She is finally free.

I ended all my Snapchat streaks. This may seem small or even completely unrelated to my happiness, but in our media-obsessed world, some people just live for maintaining their streaks, and I decided I wasn’t going to be like that because I’m not into pointless communication. If you need to tell me something, call me or text me. Send a message that’ll last.

I decided to stop worrying so much about my online connections with real people in my life and to start focusing more on my actual life connections with them. I have almost completely stopped using Snapchat and I can honestly say I feel like a whole new person, just by not utilizing one app.

Most of my friends are obsessed with keeping streaks, and I felt like it was starting to be like that too. I guess I’ve just decided that it matters more to me that I keep a streak of talking to my friends every day and having a real conversation with them than just sending them a random picture of my foot.

I’ve made it my mission to spread the love. It’s so hard and I know it is something everyone, you might not even realize it, but everyone struggles with, and that is spreading negativity and hate.

I know hate is a very powerful word, but it has a large bandwidth of reach, almost larger than that of love. Whether you are making a negative comment about someone, their personality, the sound of their voice, or more extreme by making degrading remarks about what makes them different than you, it all isn’t okay. I get it, we all need a good rant sometimes just to make yourself feel better, BUT if ranting about it will only get you more upset and cause your hatred to grow, it’s not worth it.

You’ve got to be able to rant, shake it off, and let it go. People will do or say whatever they want if they like and that is completely out of your control. If they don’t understand the consequences of their actions, that’s on them, but you cannot take their burning hate and negative vibes and allow it to fuel a hateful fire of your own. Then all that is left is a never-ending circle of hate and unhappiness and no one left to douse the flames. You are in control of your reactions and how you decide to deal with it proves what kind of person you are.

So please, just choose kind.

You’ll find a much yourself to be much happier by choosing that path.

“Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you’ll be criticized anyways.” —Eleanor Roosevelt

What are some life changes you have made recently to make yourself happier?

Thanks for stopping by,
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